Monday, 12 April 2010

Funny Facebook Groups

I was talking to a friend about funny facebook groups, and it is amazing how many I found that actually apply to me!! There are loads, I am so sorry if you read all these and then realise what a total weirdo i am... i understand if you walk away and never look back lol. If you have any more that are funny, or apply to you, please share.

· The Mini Spaz Attack When Your In Bed, Half Asleep And Imagine Your Falling

· I am not a morning person. Do not pull the covers off me. I WILL KILL YOU.

· Accomplishing something before the microwave reaches :00.

· i hate it when i get a text, and its not off the person you want it to be!

· I sing the alphabet in my head when I look up a word in the dictionary

· Killing a spider then worrying its spider buddies will seek revenge

· I say lol WAY too much

· I'm always right about everything, EVER!

· realizing your wrong in the middle of an argument but continuing to argue

· I'm trying to get to sleep, but keep thinking about random crap

· I read the group name, I laugh, I join, I never look at it again!

· I couldn't give a flying f*** about what you're up to on Farmville.

· I'll get up at 20 past... oh, it's 23 past. I'll have to write till half past now.

· Another Farmville invite and I'll kill your animals and burn your crops.

· No! I will not consider revising this fragment!

· YOU STUPID COMPUTER *it starts working* oh... sorry. I love you

· 'Sorry' 'STOP SAYING SORRY' 'sorry'

· 'brb, having a shower' then BAM you imagine them naked

· When I die I give my friends permission to change my status to 'is dead'

· Sorry, I don't speak chav. Please speak English. Thank you

· I have died over 147 times for not forwarding those chain messages

· I held the door open for your ungrateful butt, SAY THANK YOU.

· So many empty seats on this train/bus, WHY DO YOU HAVE TO SIT NEXT TO ME?!

· As soon as the headphones are in, EVERYONE starts talking to you!

· "Up Next, Loose Women" I'd rather eat a flaming bag of shit.

· I love it when bus drivers wave to each other

· And why can't my life be a musical?

· excuse me but w t f do you have your own name tattooed onto your body for?

· Listening to music on a car/train ride and feeling like you're in a movie

· When I was little I watched raindrops on the window to see which one 'won'

· Saving a file as "dyjjyggffj'', because I'm too lazy to write a proper name

· Getting your top caught on a door handle and being dragged backwards!

· Thankyou phone, for letting me look at you in awkward situations

· I honestly hate the feeling of building up for a sneeze and with no outcome

· Against Gay Marriage? Then Don't Get One and Shut the F**k Up

· At School why were we forced to cover our Jotters with wallpaper?

· When I go out looking like crap, I see just about everyone I know!

· Jesus backwards sounds like sausage. That is all.

· you shouldn't have.... you REALLY shouldn't have...

· Don't call me moody when it's your f**king fault i'm in a mood!

· All you do is sit on that computer". No, i sit on the chair.

· I Click 'Agree' to the Terms and Conditions Without Reading it.

· I blame Disney for my high expectations of men

· I am above the age of 9 and I still wake up earlier than 7 on Christmas Day

· "I HAVE ALREADY PLACED MY ITEM IN THE BAGGING AREA!!!"

· f**k council tax. i will fight crime myself and empty my own f**king bin

· My house is a shit hole, but my facebook page looks great!

· Saying YOUR WELCOME really loudly when people dont thank you

· silent treatment, not smiling, short answers = YOU DID SOMETHING WRONG!

· "Unexpected item in bagging area" "OH FUK OFF."

· Don't you just hate it when everyone loves the person you hate

· Why do all old people on the bus know each other

· When I die, I hope God shows me a best bits montage of my life

· I miss the Saturday nights which consisted of Gladiators and Blind Date

· Matilda taught me how to spell D I F F I C U L T Y

· 'Yorkies aren't for girls'? Shove your Yorkie up your ass

· If you tickle my feet I'm not responsible for what happens to your face.

· I will not be responsible for txts sent after 3am.... it's my drunk AlterEgo.

· Ooo, a tagged picture SHITT UNTAG UNTAG UNTAG!

· I check behind the shower curtain for murderers when i go into the bathroom

· I was going to post a status , then i remembered i have family on Facebook

· Gooo compare...Goo compare....oooh **** off you fat ****

· If it weren't for Facebook, i wouldn't remember your birthday

· "Everyone knows someone called Dave"

· i've always wanted to matress surf down a long flight of stairs

· dear first years, get a smaller bag. you look like a tourist...

· something really good comes out, then the chavs ruin it

· dear bed, im sorry i left you this morning, take me back? ):

· Dear shampoo, You are Supposed to clean my hair, NOT burn my eyes

· Dear Summer 2010, Please hurry up and get here. Kthanksbye.

· The mass panic when a biscuit breaks and falls into your cup of tea

· I don't give a %^&&$ about your farm. Or your £$%&%$ zoo. Or your £$%&%$ café. %^&&$ off!

· You're not drunk. You've had one drink. Stop pretending.

· Texting while lying down and dropping the phone on your face.

· Infect Farmville with foot and mouth

· Putting 2 pringles in your mouth and pretending you're a duck

· 'Tonight Matthew I'm going to be.... OFF MY FACE!'

· If history repeats itself, I'm totally getting a dinosaur.

· If you Can't Differentiate Between "Your" and "You're" You Deserve To Die

· I would take a bullet for you, not in the head, but like in the leg or something

· I hate it when you make a cuppa and every tosser in the house wants one

· No, creepy 40-year-old foreign guy, you may NOT add me as a friend

· 'I've pretended to die in front of my pet to see how they react'

· When I was young our phones didn't have internet, they had SNAKE!

· Join if you've ever put " BOOBIES" on a calculator

· Right I'm going to start my work RIGHT NOW, oh look I have a notification

· That feeling that you're going to die when you lean back to far on your chair

· i accidentally typed ;) instead of :) and now its awkward

· reading texts half asleep. . . and its like looking at the sun

· Wh3r youH from bbz? "Earth you uneducated tit"

· i didnt trip i was testing gravity. It still works.

· Having an 100% sarcastic conversation with someone who thinks your being serious.

· Trying to tell my parents a funny story . . . and it turns into a life lecture.

· Yes i have put my spoon in the bin instead of the yoghurt

· Pulling a ninja move to stop yourself slipping on ice

· When I Was Younger, I Put My Face Close to the Fan to Hear My Robot Voice.

· I still laugh when the ketchup bottle " farts"

· I don't search for groups, i wait for my friends to join them, then i copy.

· oooh, a friend request... who the hell is Iqbal?

· I hate it when someone else takes the piece of food I have mentally claimed

· my parents didn't put me in time-out, they whooped my ass!

· I use my bra as a pocket

· Hearing someones story, and thinking " Fu*k, you're so full of s!*t!"

· I Love Sleep!

· My sleeping pattern is f*cked!

· I Just Woke Up, Don't Talk to Me.

· your just a bullshitter thats why no one likes you.

· Having secret nicknames for people you hate.

· I can't remember what it's like to not feel tired.

· Being afraid that you care way more about a person than they do about you.


3 comments:

Anonymous said...

Several of those fit me too. Some are just hysterical. The net has the knack for showing us who we are lol
Love you honey XXXXXX
Graham.

Devilishly Angelic said...

yeah. At least the fact that they were made by other human beings and have members or "fans" shows that i am infact, only human and not a big old weirdo.

Karen said...

LOLOOOOOOOLLLLLLLLLL!!!! they are so you. I have a few i joined:

A child is for life.... not just for benefits

When you're out in the dark alone, everyone's a pedo!

Real men do not fit into skinny jeans

You are not a car... GET A REAL PROFILE PIC!

Changing a word because you can’t spell the word you wanted to use

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